


hold me down

by amsves



Series: Master and Man (and Other Stories) [2]
Category: Teen Titans (Animated Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bad Things Happen Bingo, Episode: s01e13 Apprentice Part 2, Face Slapping, maybe the beginnings of stockholm syndrome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-23
Updated: 2018-09-23
Packaged: 2019-07-15 20:10:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,087
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16070411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amsves/pseuds/amsves
Summary: The Titans must have finally understood how hopeless Robin’s situation was, because they hadn’t tried to rescue him in weeks.[Bad Things Happen Bingo]





	hold me down

**Author's Note:**

> Fill for an anonymous request for my bingo card! Ask and ye shall receive.  
> You don't _have_ to read 'judge, jury, and executioner' first, but it provides a bit of context.  
>  Title from the Halsey song of the same name.

The Titans must have finally understood how hopeless Robin’s situation was, because they hadn’t tried to rescue him in weeks.

Robin was fine with that. Really, he was. It was better for everyone if they accepted that he was a lost cause and treated him like the villain he was slowly becoming. 

He could try and rationalize it, claim that his intentions justified his terrible crimes, deny that his very being was being corrupted, but he wouldn't. It was just easier to admit that he was no longer worthy of the title ‘hero’ than to continue lying to himself.

It made looking in the mirror a little easier, too.

But Robin still loved his former friends, and his heart still  _ ached _ whenever he saw them in Jump City, whenever he passed by a place they used to love, whenever the long, silent nights with nothing to do couldn’t keep him distracted from the crushing guilt and shame at how weak he’d allowed himself to become. 

In the weeks he’d spent with Slade, training and studying and learning all the ways to become an awful person but a very good criminal, he’d been losing himself more and more in old memories of times when things were just so much better. Yeah, Slade had frustrated him to no end back then, with his terribly enigmatic way of speaking and his way of moving without leaving a trace, but Robin had a team willing to back him up when it mattered and willing to talk him down from his obsessions when he wasn’t thinking straight. He had a support system, a safety net, put in place in order to stop him from turning into his own worst enemy.

But the net had been slashed and Robin was in free-fall, and he was too afraid to open his eyes and see how close the bottom was.

The sound of Slade clearing his throat brought Robin back to the present. His Master was clearly annoyed at Robin’s increasing mindlessness, and a rush of something vaguely sorry and tinged with fear filled his veins. He bowed his head. “I’m sorry, Master. Could you repeat that?”

“You were thinking about your friends again.” It wasn’t a question. Slade and Robin both knew it was the truth, and Robin hated how transparent he was around this man. How was he ever supposed to escape, to cope, to level the playing field even an  _ ounce _ if Slade still knew everything he was thinking--

_ Crack _ .

A powerful backhand slap landed on Robin’s face and the force of it knocked him to the ground. He clutched at his cheek, feeling the injured flesh … yeah, that would bruise pretty badly.

“You need to stop thinking about them, Robin.” 

Slade was right. Robin did need to stop thinking about the Titans. They belonged to his former life, when he still believed that he was a good person who would  _ never  _ stoop this low. They belonged in the light, leading the citizens of Jump City in justice, saving people in need with a fearless smile and a helping hand. He wasn’t worthy of them, not their friendship, not their time, not their memories. 

Slade’s foot stomped down dangerously close to Robin’s hand. “Did you hear me, Robin?”

“I need to stop thinking about the Titans,” he said dully, and Slade made a noise of agreement.

A hand was extended to Robin on the floor, and the former Boy Wonder used it to help himself up. “Very good, Robin. It seems you can listen after all.”

Robin tried not to think about how the note of genuine affection and approval in Slade’s voice made his skin feel too tight, about the bile rising in his throat, about how Slade’s praise made him feel just a little warm inside. He dusted off his hands and ran his tongue along the inside of his cheek, feeling for cuts. 

“As I was saying,” Slade continued, and Robin fought to stay concentrated on his mentor, “Other than the obvious discipline problems, you have actually been doing quite well. I was thinking that I should reward your immense progress in some way. Do you have any ideas?”

Pizza. A night off from missions. Any tidbit of useful information on Slade’s plans, allies, background. A chance to contact the Titans and just tell them how  _ sorry _ he was, not that he had sided with Slade, but that things couldn’t be different. A set of casual clothes or pajamas without Slade’s insignia on them. Video games. A book to read. A way out. Millions of possibilities flew by in his mind, but Robin couldn’t bring himself to voice any of them. 

He stayed silent.

Slade shook his head slowly. “And here I was thinking you would jump at this chance. It’s an open-ended opportunity, Robin. I set no parameters when I offered it to you. Of course, that doesn’t mean I don’t have them, but … to ask for nothing? You must really be my apprentice after all.”

A flash of something terribly mortifying entered Robin’s mind and took control of his tongue. “I want …” he started, but he lost the words. 

Slade waited. Robin tried again. “I … nevermind.” He was blushing, he was sure. It was embarrassing, what he wanted. He couldn’t have what he truly needed (a way out), but maybe … no. This was too humiliating, too degrading to even ask for. 

“Finish your sentence,” Slade commanded, and Robin took a deep breath.

“Iwantyoutodothatthingyoudidearliermoreoften,” he blurted before he could stop himself again.

“Explain.”

Robin wrapped arms around himself and stared solidly at his feet. “Earlier, when you helped me off the floor … that was nice. I want that to happen more often. Or something like that. Just … physical contact that isn’t violence is … I want it.” He glanced up nervously. “Is that acceptable for a reward?”

Slade was silent for a moment. Robin held his breath until his Master touched his bruising cheek gently with a gloved finger. “Would applying some anti-bruising cream be a good place to start?”

Robin flushed, but he couldn’t help the smile that turned the corners of his mouth up just ever so slightly. “Okay,” he said quietly. 

“Remember this, Robin,” Slade intoned, “When you behave as I expect you to, you earn rewards. When you disobey me, you get punishments. It’s quite simple, really. A boy as smart as you should be able to understand in no time.”

“Yes, Master,” Robin replied quietly, feeling lighter and yet heavier at the same time.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me and request bingo squares on [Tumblr](http://www.skeletoncloset.tumblr.com)


End file.
